Jenny says, “Lets talk about continence” and age with dignity.

For Jenny Haslam talking about continence is part of ageing honestly and with dignity. 

World Continence Week is from June 15-21 and the resident at Uniting AgeWell Aldersgate Community Kings Meadows is adamant not to shy away from an issue affecting one in four older Australians over the age of 85 – including her. 

The theme of World Continence Week is “When you’ve got to go, we’ve got you – we’re here to help.” The campaign aims to reduce the stigma around bladder and bowel health and encourage Australians to seek support. 

While there are many discrete continence supports on the market, there are also preventative exercises you can do to strengthen your internal muscles.  Our Uniting AgeWell Community Hubs have dedicated core and pelvic strengthening exercises and classes you can enrol in privately, or through Support At Home. 

“The body gets older, the bladder gets weaker especially after childbirth, I don’t understand why there is a feeling of shame and embarrassment attached to this happening,” Jenny says firmly. “It happens to so many older people. The staff here are very kind and empathetic, and everyone is able to maintain their dignity.” 

This is one of the reasons why the mother-of-four is loving life at Kings Meadows where she has made a new set of friends and is eating well.  She’s also enjoying something she hasn’t experienced for a while.  Fun – and a sense of belonging.  

Her only regret is that she did not move into the community much earlier.  “I’d lost a lot of weight and really wasn’t eating properly at home,” explains Jenny, 90.   “Although I was on a home care package, my needs had grown and I realised deep down that I was going through the motions without really coping.” 

 “I’d just have tea and toast for dinner, it was too much of a bother to even think about cooking.  I was also lonely.  I couldn’t drive anymore and I had become isolated. My Parkinson’s disease had taken away my confidence and I was also worried that my decreased mobility meant I couldn’t take my dog, Charlie, for proper walks.  It wasn’t fair on him.  I didn’t really talk about how I was feeling, I didn’t want anyone to worry.” 

Jenny’s tiredness levels increased, and earlier last year she decided that two weeks respite care at Kings Meadows would be a good idea.  It was a place that she trusted.  Her late husband Brian moved into Kings Meadows in 2020 after he had a stroke.  Jenny had struggled for months as his carer and when she was no longer able to lift him, she realised he needed specialised round-the-clock attention. 

“I saw the great care the staff lavished on Brian, so I knew I would be in good hands,” she says. “I thought this might be an opportunity for me to rest and regain some strength.”  

When Jenny went in for respite care, she was given a thorough top-to-toe physical assessment where it was found her protein levels were very low.  Nurses also monitored her Parkinson’s disease, provided her with podiatry care and ensured she received holistic care.   

“It’s amazing, there are always nurses on duty.  How good is that?” Jenny says.  “I get regular check-ups and attention every day.  I don’t have to arrange medical appointments, hire a taxi and then go for assessment or help.  It’s all here!” 

The two weeks whizzed by.  She found she could relax, knowing the cleaning of her room, her laundry, and the preparing of nutritious protein-packed meals were all taken care of.  Personal care was always available and proved a great comfort. 

Jenny decided she needed that extra care and moved in permanently.  “There’s something magical about the really good vibes of this place,” explains Jenny.  “The staff have the extraordinary ability to help me feel at home.  We’re a community here.  I feel like I belong, like I’m surrounded by people who really care about me.” 

Jenny is still enjoying the feeling of being worry-free.  “It’s a funny thing, I sleep so soundly at night.  I have absolutely nothing to worry about anymore.  I feel totally at peace, if that makes sense.” 

An important part of her life in her new home is that she retains dignity and feels respected.  “I get personal care to help with showering, and I can ask to shower whenever I want, without feeling like I am being a nuisance.” 

South African-born Jenny is now finding the time and the opportunity to do things she loves with her new circle of friends.  She relishes going on bus outings, is enjoying the craft lessons and even takes part in all the exercise classes which she says are building up both her muscle mass and her strength. 

“I work out three times a week!” Jenny says.  

“This growing old is a learning curve, so it’s good to be able to swap stories and experiences with others going through the same thing.  You can have a bit of a laugh knowing we’re all in the same boat!” 

Kings Meadows Residential Services Manager Mandi Blignault says “I am very proud of the care and holistic approach that our community provides.  It is a small site that provides personalised care.  We all know each other, and it is a sense of community.  The care our residents receive is second to none, and we are very fortunate to have the best team members on staff.”